Reflections on my spiritual formation in light of strengths and weaknesses

            My most recent spiritual formation course is coming to a close. This semester I have examined and evaluated my personality, strengths, and weaknesses. Now I am being challenged to consider where these insights place me in the developmental timeline as a leader, how my discoveries impact personal change, and how this has influenced me.

            One of my assignments last semester was to identify which timeline phase I was in as specified in Clinton’s book The Making of a Leader. I thought that I had entered the Ministry Maturing phase and subcategory of the early ministry sub-phase in which the leader is given ministry tasks and challenges.[1] My ministry influence continues to be very direct with men.

            In last semester’s final paper, I wrote about looking for a new church.[2] I was questioning the sufficiency of my ministry context. A month later when starting this class, I had reached a conclusion that I needed to stay planted where I am. This was also probably a test as part of my initial ministry maturing phase. Soon after, the Lord slammed the breaks on my ministry development through my church, due to my Lead Pastor stepping down. Everything I was working on with him (or that he was working on to allow more opportunities for me) has ended or been placed on hold. The Lord has returned my focus mostly to ministering to men in my home. Other changes (soon to come) for seminary education are causing me to slow down and enjoy the journey. Last year I really felt driven to discover my ministry call and to begin to make a transition into vocational ministry. The Lord is slowing me down and has enabled me to take my hands off the steering wheel so that I am no longer trying to force an emergence of my ministry call or any transitions.

            One of my key insights about change from last semester was that awareness is especially important for my change process.[3] Wrestling is also a major component: wrestling with my true need, God’s way to meet it, and the wrong ways that I may be meeting this need.[4] My number one strength, the intelligizer, really helps with these things. Once I gain clarity regarding my need and the proper way to move forward, my Responsibility strength enacts, and I take on complete psychological ownership for my decisions and actions.[5]

            Community is also particularly important for my spiritual formation. Relational and conflict processing, dying to self, confession, obedience by putting myself under the obedience of another are some change factors and means of grace that I identified; these and more are enacted in community.[6] My relational strength pulls me towards deep relationships that allow for these things. Navigating conflict is one of my biggest challenges and my weaknesses seem to be highlighted most during these times; this is especially true as I share my home with others. The community I enjoy is exposing woundedness and allowing for insight and healing. Right now, the ministry I engage in is changing me and is for my own spiritual growth just as much as it is for others.

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[1] Dr. J. Robert Clinton, The Making of a Leader, Colorado Springs: NavPress (1988, 2012), 68.

[2] Jason Fusek, “How God Changes Me”, Marion: Wesley Seminary (2019), 10.

[3] Jason Fusek, “How God Changes Me”, Marion: Wesley Seminary (2019), 1.

[4] Jason Fusek, “How God Changes Me”, Marion: Wesley Seminary (2019), 3.

[5] Don., Clifton, StrengthsFinder 2.0 (New York: GALLUP PRESS, 2017), 149.

[6] Jason Fusek, “How God Changes Me”, Marion: Wesley Seminary (2019), 2, 5, 6.

My strenghts as observed by those who know me

This week I asked a few people (who know me well) to share what they observe to be my strengths, particularly when it comes to ministry. The responses were somewhat similar but also had distinct differences that, I think, is the result of both how well the person knows me and the context of the relationship which we share.

Mike Scamilhorn, a mentor and former Executive Pastor, shared these observations:

1.         You have a servant’s heart.  I see your desire to serve others by facilitating opportunities for them to grow in relationship with God and others.
2.         You desire to use your talents to make a difference...music at church, studying with others to grow in knowledge of the bible, and your desire to use your home and other physical resources to help make a difference in the lives of others that appear to need a leg up.
3.         I see a tenderness towards those struggling to feel valued. I see your own relational struggles as places you invite others in to be real, vulnerable, and accepted.
4.          I see you living out of your strength of responsibility to do what you say will do. When you give your word, you are all in if at all possible.
5.         I see you valuing relationship through creativity, intellection, and service. You love to play and engage in the camaraderie of doing things with others. Music, or video games, or worship/prayer is always better for you in community than in solitude.
6. I think overall you have a heart of determination to be a true son of God. You long to live your life for a purpose and for it to count for others to know Jesus in closer relationship because of the interaction of community.

Hampton Hancock, a close friend that I have known for 25+ years, shared these observations:

1. Teaching: Jason can analyze the Word of God, explain the meaning, context, and application. Jason has the ability to clearly instruct and communicate knowledge. I have seen Jason lead several groups at NJCC. From worship-based prayer, to a monthly men’s group, Jason is not only willing to lead, he has a lot of passion into giving context and uplifting people.
2. Discerning: Jason possesses the ability to discern truth from deceit.  He can listen to issues and then discern the correct approach. I have known Jason since 1996, and through that time, Jason, through prayer and studies, could discern duplicity. He can hear what people say and through language verbal or by body, with the guidance of the Holy Spirit can get a sense of how he can minister to them. Jason doesn’t react initially, but listens, absorbs, and reflects. I think that by his ability to listen to others, and initially withhold his own judgement, it gives him perspective, and then with prayer, he is able to discern the logical course of action most of the time.
3. Serving: Jason has a natural ability and want to be able to give of himself and serve even when he doesn’t feel like it. He is able to put others needs ahead of his own. In all my years of knowing Jason, he has willingly served others, both individually, and corporately. He would serve on prayer teams, worship teams, and outreach and leadership teams. He would clean for people, cook for people, and no task is ever “below” him. If he is able to do it, he eagerly does it with thanksgiving and love. 
4. Mercy: This goes hand in hand with encouragement. If Jason senses a need, he will always show mercy and forgiveness, giving of himself eagerly and showing mercy even when the person receiving it doesn’t deserve it. Jason realizes that he deserved death through sin, and he was shown mercy, and he gives it easily. Jason has a passion to help people. This ties in well with his discerning and serving. Jason gives of himself unconditionally, and sometimes in observation, too much. He is willing to sacrifice his own comfort to help other people. His own brother struggles with alcoholism, and he has forgiven him many times over, and still gives. I haven’t been the best of persons, and struggle with my anxiety, and has shown me mercy. In fact, in my estimation, Jason has been the closest example to a living saint I have ever met. He isn’t perfect, has his struggles, and issues he knows he needs to work on. Yet, I can say, I would like to follow him as he follows Christ. That is in parallel to Paul saying, follow me, like I follow Christ. Jason will always be merciful over judging, love over hate, and is the most honorable man I have had the honor to meet in my life.

Adam Van Treese is a man I have gotten to know closely over the past year through mutual accountability and is now living in my home as he goes through a trial separation. He shared:

1.          Empathy: Having been dealing with some serious issues in my life; you have been good at understanding my feelings. Even though you haven’t been through this particular struggle, I’ve appreciated feeling like you understand.
2.         Listening: You have an uncommon ability to listen to what someone is going through and not try to speak. While you have given wise counsel, you have also known when to be quiet and just kind of absorb what is being said.
3.         Knowledge: I’ve appreciated your knowledge of scripture and application when discussing our common struggle.
4.          Perseverance: As someone who has dealt with one of the same struggles you have, I’m thankful to know that perseverance does pay off. You keep getting back in the fight and it is inspiring.
5.          Encouragement: More than any of my support system, I’ve felt encouraged by what you have said, when you have chosen to speak into my life.

Spiritual Gift Tests

This week in Seminary, we read an article by Dr. Ken Schenck’s entitled The Bible and Spiritual Gifts Tests. He opens the article with the 3 well-known passages on Spiritual Gifts (1Corinthians 12:4-8, Romans 12:4-8, and Ephesians 4:11-13); they have been used to develop Spiritual Gift tests.

Dr. Schenck writes, “spiritual gift tests feed a sense that God has given us a clear cut destiny, purpose, and meaning in this world.”[1] While these tests may point us further in a direction, I think the downside of these tests is actually to minimize God’s purpose for the Christian; they seem to point towards more being a minister in the Church for the Church, which I am defining as in using the spiritual gifts during times when Christians gather together. “So, it would seem that spiritual gift tests sometimes mistake the scope of these passages. It treats the lists as exhaustive, when we have no reason to think Paul intended the that way.”[2]

1 Corinthians 12:4 is a basis for many spiritual gift tests: “To each is given the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good.”[3] It is presupposed that everyone has been given a gift for the benefit of the Church. Perhaps we miss something by not considering the context: that Paul was writing to a church that was disorderly in worship, particularly through the gift of tongues.[4] He encouraged unity and ordered use of spiritual gifts for the benefit of the whole Corinthian Church. He was, thus, addressing the Corinthian Church on very specific issues which were disruptive to unity.

This not to say that spiritual gift lists in the Bible are incorrect. Spiritual gifts will look and be manifest differently as the Spirit gives grace… to each believer and… to each church. I agree with Dr. Schneck’s statement that, “the lists of spiritual gifts are probably much more general and impressionistic than timeless or exhaustive.”[5] Spiritual gift tests can be an invaluable tool to help initially identify gifts. However, over time, I think spiritual gifts are both self-evident and evidenced by fruit.

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[1] Dr, Ken Schenck, The Bible and Spiritual Gift Tests, 2.

[2] Dr, Ken Schenck, The Bible and Spiritual Gift Tests, 3.

[3] Dr, Ken Schenck, The Bible and Spiritual Gift Tests, 2.

[4] Dr, Ken Schenck, The Bible and Spiritual Gift Tests, 2.

[5] Dr, Ken Schenck, The Bible and Spiritual Gift Tests, 3.

My Strengths -- Spiritual Growth and Opportunities

Intellection, Strategic, and Input has fueled my study of Scripture and reading of many books. The way I tend to look at Scripture is a means to hear the voice of God for myself and others. And I approach nearly all books that same way – as means to hear from the Holy Spirit and learn of the world through His eyes, including sometimes the contrasts to the viewpoints that are in direct opposition to him. Of Intellection, the Strength Insight Report stated that you might consider yourself a great educator and I think that also means perhaps a good teacher.[1] Time will tell if this is the case as I am just getting started – but I do enjoy presenting things God is teaching me at monthly men’s breakfasts. Soon I will have the chance to share on Sunday mornings as well.

The Relator strength has fueled a desire to be in close relationship with other men and to be in accountability. I have sought this through friendship and more formal means (such as accountability groups) for the past 20+ years. Now I am stepping into a new opportunity to facilitate Living Free groups in my church, which is a type of Scripture-based recovery curriculum.

I have served on worship teams for quite awhile. The Strategic and Input strengths have allowed me to creatively contribute to the sound of the team. This is something that has been developed over the last 25 years playing acoustic guitar. I used to be just a one man band but about 15 years ago things changed and I found myself playing parts and doing things to amplify the sound of the team.

Responsibility has played a huge part in just being reliable in whatever capacity and role I serve. I am known for my steadiness, reliability, and faithfulness.

Coming alongside friends, supporting them, and walking with them through struggles and in their walk with Christ is something that gives me great joy. This is probably where I find my gifts of intellection, strategy, relator, and input combine to be a great friend. I am thinking this will naturally and spiritually lead me into counseling and a supportive pastoral ministry role.

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[1]CliftonStrengths, Strengths Insight Guide (GALLUP: 2000), 3.